A senior citizen was driving down the freeway, his car phone rang. Answering, he heard his wife’s voice urgently warning him, „Herman, I just heard on the news that there’s a car going the wrong way on Interstate 77. Please be careful!“ „Heck,“ said Herman, „It’s not just one [...]

An elderly gentleman had serious hearing problems for a number of years. He went to the doctor and the doctor was able to have him fitted for a set of hearing aids that allowed the gentleman to hear 100%. The elderly gentleman went back to the doctor after a [...]

FIRST DEGREE A married couple were asleep when the phone rang at 2 in the morning. The very blonde wife picked up the phone, listened a moment and said „How should I know, that’s 200 miles from here!“ and hung up. The husband said, „Who was that?“ The wife [...]

Year 1981 1. Prince Charles got married 2. Liverpool crowned soccer Champions of Europe 3. Pope Died. Year 2005 1. Prince Charles got married (again) 2. Liverpool crowned soccer Champions of Europe (again) 3. Pope Died. In the future, if Prince Charles decides to re-marry or Liverpool needs another [...]

Danny had recently passed his driving test and decided to ask his clergyman father if there was any chance of him getting a car for Christmas, which was yet some months away. ‘Okay.’ said his father ‘I tell you what I’ll do. If you can get your ‘A’ level [...]

Dear Bo$$, A$ all of u$ have read from the new$paper report $ from Trevor Manuel’$ speech, the U$A economy ha$ come out of the rece$$ion. In thi$ life, we all need $omething mo$t de$perately. I think you $hould show under$tanding for the need$ of u$ worker$ who have [...]

A secretary for a foreign embassy was entertaining a wealthy foreign ambassador during lunch at a very expensive restaurant in uptown New York. The ambassador was so enthralled by the beauty and presence of this secretary that he asked her to marry him. The secretary was startled, but remembered [...]

A lonely widow, age 70, decided that it was time to get married again. She put an ad in the local paper that read: HUSBAND WANTED: MUST BE IN MY AGE GROUP (70’s), MUST NOT BEAT ME, RUN AROUND ON ME, AND MUST STILL BE GOOD IN BED! ALL [...]

The man was in no shape to drive, so he wisely left his car parked and walked home. As he was walking unsteadily along, he was stopped by a policeman. „What are you doing out here at 2 A.M.?“ said the officer. „I’m going to a lecture.“ the man [...]

1. I can see your point, but I still think you’re full of shit. 2. I don’t know what your problem is, but I’ll bet it’s hard to pronounce. 3. How about never? Is never good for you? 4. I see you’ve set aside this special time to humiliate [...]