The following are actual, real-life accident descriptions given on insurance claim forms…

• To avoid hitting the bumper of the car in front of me, I struck a pedestrian.
• I was on the way to the doctor with rear end trouble when my universal joint gave way causing me to have an accident.
• I thought my window was down, but I found it was up when I put my head through it.
• Coming home I drove into the wrong house and collided with a tree I don’t have.
• A truck backed through my windshield into my wife’s face.
• The other car collided with mine without giving warning.
• I collided with a stationary truck coming the other way.
• The guy was all over the road. I had to swerve a number of times before I hit him.
• I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother- in-law and headed over the embankment.
• In an attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole.
• I had been shopping for plants all day and was on my way home. As I reached an intersection a hedge sprang up, obscuring my vision and I did not see the other car.
• I had been driving for forty years when I fell asleep at the wheel and had an accident.
• As I approached an intersection a sign suddenly appeared in a place where no stop sign had ever appeared before. I was unable to stop in time to avoid the accident.
• My car was legally parked as it backed into another vehicle.
• An invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my car and vanished.
• I told the police that I was not injured, but on removing my hat found that I had a fractured skull.
• I was sure the old fellow would never make it to the other side of the road when I struck him.
• I saw a slow moving, sad faced old gentleman as he bounced off the roof of my car.
• The indirect cause of the accident was a little guy in a small car with a big mouth.
• I was thrown from my car as it left the road. I was later found in a ditch by some stray cows.
• The telephone pole was approaching. I was attempting to swerve out of the way when I struck the front end.
• The pedestrian had no idea which way to run as I ran over him!