He said to me … I don’t know why you wear a bra; you’ve got nothing to put in it.
I said to him … You wear pants don’t you?

He said to me … Shall we try swapping positions tonight?
I said … That’s a good idea – you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart!

He said to me … What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you?
I said to him … Turn sideways and look in the mirror!

He said to me … Why don’t women blink during foreplay?
I said to him … They don’t have time

He said to me … How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
I said to him … We don’t know; it has never happened.

He said to me … Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and Good- looking?
I said to him … They already have boyfriends.

He said … What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
I said … A widow.

He said to me … Why are married women heavier than single women?
I said to him … Single women come home, see what’s in the fridge and go to bed. Married women come home, see what’s in bed and go to the fridge.